Ask Afrobella — Curly, Coily, Kinky, or Coarse

I had a really interesting experience recently. Picture this. It’s a Wednesday afternoon, I’d just finished my deadline for work. About to have a window of downtime before the cycle picks up again… Then my editor-in-chief calls and asks me to represent our newspaper on a panel at a meeting of the South Florida Black Journalists Association. I immediately said no problem, got myself together, and headed over to the venue. I had absolutely no idea what I was heading into, and I’m so glad I went. The evening turned out to be really interesting and I met a lot of cool people — fellow journalists, members of the audience, business owners.

At the end of the question and answer session, I was swarmed by people who wanted to introduce themselves, and to exchange business cards and stuff. A few people told me they’d heard of Afrobella, but had no idea I was local. Some people just wanted to ask me about my site, some people wanted to ask me about that novel I’m writing… good grief. Every time I think of my novel, I hear the voice of Stewie Griffin in my head.

So anyway, at the end of the business card bonanza, I stepped out of the crowd and wound up chatting with some media peeps. Then a tall, striking, beautiful black woman approached me to talk about hair. And the fact that she wanted to go natural, but couldn’t. Why? “My hair isn’t like yours. It wouldn’t look good natural.” She wore her hair short and relaxed, but in that stage where my old hairdresser would advise me to “touch up my roots.” “Are you kidding me? What does that mean?” I asked her. I tried to tell her that I disagreed with her sentiment. I told her a little about my own transitioning period, and that it took my hair a long time to recover from years of chemicals. I had to teach myself how to style, shampoo, and care for my natural hair. I told her that I was sure if she gave it a shot and stuck it out, she’d grow to love her hair in its natural state. “That’s easy for you to say,” she said.

She kept asking me how I got my hair to “do that.” I explained that I really didn’t do anything to it, it’s really just how it naturally grows out of my head. Some parts spiral perfectly, other parts are more kinky and own-way, some curl down, some stick up. Some of it feels soft to the touch, others feel as tough as rope, depending on when I’ve last conditioned it. That day, I didn’t even comb through in the shower — all I’d done was conditioner washed it, added some Elasta QP Mango butter moisturizer, and sped over to the venue as fast as I could. I even air-dried it with my windows down. She said she liked the natural style and the look, but she was adamant that it didn’t look good on her. Once again she reiterated, her hair wouldn’t be attractive in it’s natural state. Here’s where it got kind of vague.

She was asking me how best she should style her hair so it could “look like mine,” because her hair didn’t curl up when she did briefly try to go natural. She told me she didn’t like her natural hair when she just washed it and used a styling product. But she didn’t want to do twists to achieve the curly style she described, and it annoyed her that every quite-unquote natural stylist she went to insisted that she do twists to get what they thought she wanted. OK. So… your hair doesn’t grow naturally in spirals, but you want it to, but you don’t want to twist it? She looked at me, expectantly. But I honestly had no idea how to answer her question… or even what her question really was. I explained that even though I call myself Afrobella and I write about hair issues and do product reviews, I am SO not a hair dresser, or a hair care professional. I haven’t tried a range of natural styles, and I’m not intimately familiar with a wide range of natural hair textures. I just do what works for me, and I let people know what’s working and what’s not.

I chatted with her for quite a while and tried to explain that her hair is beautiful in its natural state, all she needed to do was to give natural another try. Stick with it, don’t give up, and take the time to make sure your hair is healthy — that’s the most important thing. I even recommended some products she should try. She didn’t seem moved. Then I realized that I couldn’t convince her of anything. I was basically trying to talk someone into loving their hair, and it felt like preaching, so I stopped. I didn’t know how to make her believe that her her hair was beautiful, or to make her understand that everyone’s natural is different, and her hair could be unique, beautiful, healthy, and strong — if only she let go of her preconceived notions of what natural hair “should” look like. It felt so strange having someone act like my own hair was their gold standard, after the comments and criticism I’ve faced in my own natural journey. I absolutely horrified my family when I decided to stop using the creamy crack completely. People have called me Brillo-pad head. To this day, I still get the occasional “what are you going to do with that bird’s nest” comment from people who have known me for a long time. And even now when I am a proud and self-described Afrobella, sometimes I still have fleeting moments of doubt. Sometimes I wake up in the morning, comb through it, add product, look at myself in the mirror, and feel a quavering in my self-confidence meter. Is my hair too big? Too puffy? Too crazy for work? That’s when I put on more lip gloss, add some jewelry, and convince myself I’m the flyest chick on the scene before I leave the house. I wanted to tell this lady that she had to believe in her own beauty and learn how to own her fro on her own terms, but I didn’t have the presence of mind, the energy, the time, or the knowledge to say what I think she needed to hear. So, I went to an expert.

Bellas, I’d like to introduce erin shell anthony, author of Nappturosity — How to Create Fabulous Natural Hair and Locs. Erin has conducted over 200 presentations on health, natural lifestyles and related empowering topics around the country in the last 3 years, and is the creator and founder of the adaru natural hair salon in Indianapolis. She has seen it all, and produced an e book that is chock full of photos and guidance to keeping your hair naturally beautiful.

I asked her my Ask Afrobella non-question — what would she say to a woman who is convinced that she can’t go natural? She said this.

“To the women who don’t think they can go natural because their hair isn’t __(fill in the blank)_, or those who are having a hard time loving their natural hair, I say - FIND the beauty! Countless women who successfully transitioned to natural hair had to go through the process of discovering the beauty in their own kinks and curls. The very essence of the word “transition” is movement and change from one state to another. For many, it’s going to feel very un-natural to be natural in the beginning! It doesn’t matter how many supportive women, books, or magazines you have, the experience will still be solely yours.”

AMEN, Erin!!! She said it so much better than I could.

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My Two Cents

I’m going to be on NPR’s News and Notes today! If you’d like to hear my perspectives on the political and cultural issues of the moment, check your local listings and tune in! For those of you who aren’t able to listen live, I’ll post the link as soon as it’s online, which should be by the end of today.

Edited at 11:15 p.m. — Here’s the link! Click and listen.

Afrobella, Interviewed by Belle Noir!

Bellas, I was recently interviewed by the beautiful ladies at Belle Noir magazine.

In case you haven’t heard of Belle Noir, it’s a wonderful site for big, beautiful women of color. Check them out. And I liked the questions she asked me in the interview! In case you were wondering what’s in my makeup bag, or what products I recommend for those of you about to go natural, check it out!

Much love to Belle Noir, and thanks for the honor!

Meeting Billy B

I’ve been pretty much obsessed with the makeup wizardry of Billy B. since I first saw the video for Lauryn Hill’s Ex-Factor. Or no wait, it was Missy Elliott’s “She’s a Bitch.” Or maybe it was the video for Independent Women by Destiny’s Child. When I was soaking up all that beauty inspiration, I had no idea who Billy B was, of course. I just knew that here were strong, beautiful black women and I wanted to look just as beautiful as they did.

Billy B has been behind the scenes of music videos and television shows, beating the faces of celebs from Sharon Stone and Natalie Maines to Mary J. Blige and Tina Turner. Oh yes. When I interviewed Billy on the phone — he was visiting Miami for The Makeup Show — he had just come from doing Tina Turner’s makeup for her performance of Proud Mary at the Grammys. She looked amazing (aside from her Robocop couture), but still Billy doubted his work. “I would make some different choices after seeing it. I’m not sure about the red mouth in hindsight, not sure about the contour. I was standing there with her, thinking how did this happen? How did I go from Aberdeen Mississippi to doing Tina Turner for the Grammys? There’s still these moments of clarity for me where you’re sort of, how did I get here? And when are they going to figure out that this is the biggest scam ever? This is one of the few living American… not even just American. Icons. Ever. And here I am!” Billy attributes his continued success to humility. He is a very real, very humble kind of guy. “I never fully feel like I deserve to be there. I think that’s what keeps me successful, and I think that’s something new makeup artists can learn from. Most think their s*%t don’t stink, and they’re better than everybody, and they deserve so much more than they already have. The reality is, none of us do.”

Billy has been at the top of the game, and at the bottom of the heap. He has had to eat humble pie quite a few times in the biz. Billy B.’s fairytale life story is well known to anyone who’s obsessed with makeup and music videos — as my homegirl Lianne The Makeup Girl said in her interview with him, “small town boy with big town dreams.” In the Eighties, by day Billy B. worked the makeup counter at Macy’s in Times Square. By night he was cleaning up vomit at nightclubs in New York City. Sick skills and one lucky break led to him making $500 an hour. Now he’s done just about every celebrity you can think of, for print, television, fashion shows, whatever.

I had an great telephone interview with Billy before the show, we chatted at length about his career and his new line of brushes, which are professional quality, and designed especially to avoid the pitfalls Billy has encountered with other brushes. They’re short, light, and very specifically designed for particular tasks. He is especially proud of his eyelash curler ($15, a steal) and he uses brush #9 to build the bottom lashes with mascara. More on that later.

So following a fun phoner, I was ready to meet Billy B. at The Makeup Show Miami. I got to the convention center in the afternoon, an hour or so before he was about to begin his keynote presentation. And excuse me while I gush for a moment, but something quite exciting happened. I got recognized! By a complete stranger! So there I am, walking into the Miami Beach Convention Center, when a lovely bella with adorable twists comes jogging after me. “Excuse me… are you Afrobella?” she asked. Yes I am! OMG YAY! She was super sweet. Her name is Ethanie, she’s a makeup artist from… Philly? And we took a couple of photos together. E mail me, Ethanie! It was a pleasure to meet you.

OK, so then I entered the main atrium and was instantly dazzled. There were booths from product lines I knew well — MAC, Stila, Make Up For Ever. And there were some new niche products there, like Obsessive Compulsive Cosmetics which has a great range of loose color, and Big Girl Cosmetics. Lots of you have asked me to specifically highlight products made for women of color by women of color. Look no further! I met Kiley Russell the founder and CEO, and she is a fly and self possessed sista. I got one of their Diva Glosses in my to-go bag, and I LOVE it! Definitely check em out, bellas.

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Discussing Obama and Beyonce on NPR

I got snowed under by a work avalanche, but I am poking my head out long enough to announce that I was on NPR’s News and Notes blogger’s roundtable again yesterday, alongside Ambra Nykol of Nykola and Robert Redding of The Redding News Review.

Click here to listen!

Forgetful Jones

I’ve had a crazier week than normal, so I have been a bit more forgetful than usual. For example, I was on NPR’s News and Notes blogger’s roundtable on Monday, and I completely forgot to post it and let you all know. Mea culpa. Please click here if you’d like to hear my two cents about the latest Jena 6 drama, Cynthia McKinney’s indie campaign, black history month, and the Grammys.

And I must admit, I didn’t answer that last Grammy question well because I hadn’t yet seen Kanye’s performance. To be really real with you, when Farai asked me the last question I was thinking … huh? Whaa? I was so unsure. Instead of watching the Grammy Awards all the way through the night before, I was flipping channels. I did catch the Foos, but all I really wanted to see was Amy Winehouse, Tina Turner (who looked so fabulous! More on that later), and Aretha Franklin, who Fresh called out proper. I mean no disrespect intended to the Queen of Soul here, but… does Aretha have a stylist in her current employ? Cause it might be time to put an ad out on Craigslist. First new rule — just say NO to spaghetti straps. Aretha, call me. I’ll get you a flattering dress with soft, ruffly short kimono-type sleeves and a v-neck that doesn’t plunge down to THERE. Especially for a gospel medley. Good googly moogly.

Back to Kanye. Now that I’ve seen his Grammy performance, I definitely think Kanye was better than the Foo Fighters. It was touching and heartfelt in a way that the Foos bombastic, orchestral performance couldn’t be. Kanye’s that artist who has laid himself so open to the world, you feel like you know him. He annoys the bejesus out of me sometimes with his cocky attitude and constant self aggrandizement — I was literally cringing during the first moments of his awkward acceptance speech. But he pulled it together, finished on a strong and touching note, and delivered a phenomenal performance IMO.

I mean, damn. If that doesn’t make the backs of your eyes prickle with tears, I don’t know what will. So in retrospect, I give it up. You killed it, Kanye. You made your fans, and your mama very, very proud.

Sandra Hordatt’s Tips for Carnival Wow!

At the risk of not sounding like a true Trini, I have a confession to make. I haven’t been home for Carnival in a decade. TEN YEARS! What can I tell you? College, then the workplace, then financial constrictions always seem to conspire against me. I must admit, I feel very left out and more than a little depressed when I visit sites like Trinidad Carnival Diary, which is all about the fun of Trini mas.

Even though I haven’t been home for the highly anticipated annual event in ages, that doesn’t mean I don’t love Carnival. I always have. Ask mama bella — as a little one I couldn’t miss Viey la Cou (an annual celebration of traditional carnival), and I used to even collect the abandoned masks and standards left by masqueraders in the street after the parade of people passed on Carnival Monday and Tuesday.

I’ve always loved the pageantry and spectacle of mas. And just because I won’t be there this year doesn’t mean I am not looking out for you bellas who will! I wanted to do a post all about Carnival makeup, because it is an art form in itself. Creating a lasting, stunning look that will survive buckets of sweat and the relentless Caribbean sun isn’t easy. So I reached out to one of Trinidad’s leading makeup artists, the talented and beautiful Sandra Hordatt, with questions about creating that perfect Carnival day look. (this is her brand-new MySpace page, but you’ll learn a lot more about her from this profile in the Trinidad Express).

Sandra made her name in modeling, make up. and mas. She is an artist and a costume designer for Island People Mas. For this year’s Animal Instincts band, she’s designed two sections (scroll down to see them) — the hot to death Dragon Lizard, and the resplendent Kingfisher Bird. (Sandra’s costumes range in price from $433 to $1916 USD. And they’re all sold out).

To give you an idea of the kind of looks Sandra comes up with, check out Trinidad’s 2006 Miss Universe delegate Kenisha Thom in the beautiful butterfly costume Sandra designed for her to wear at the pageant. Besides designing amazing Carnival costumes, Sandra’s got a reputation as one of THE premiere makeup artists in Trinidad right now. Her strong suit is covering blemishes and creating a flawless canvas without a heavily plastered on look. I caught up with her for all of fifteen minutes, as she raced from making up a client to her designing duties at the mas camp, to put the finishing touches before the impending Carnival madness.

Afrobella – How many faces do you do on average for Carnival Monday and Tuesday? Or are you out yourself, playing mas in a costume you designed?

Sandra Hordatt — I try not to work on Carnival, I like to be out on the road to see the costumes. I don’t take any bookings. I just do makeup for myself and my friends on Monday and Tuesday.

Afrobella – I think the biggest concern for Carnival is getting your makeup to stay on. You glue on all these face jewels and glitter and then you’re jumping and waving in the blazing hot sun for hours. How do you make your look last through the sweat and the heat?

Sandra – I say focus on your eyes. Obviously you’ll be sweating a lot, so your foundation will probably melt. Make sure you wear sun block, and just do a really dramatic eye and it should last all day. So your first layer should definitely be sun block, then use a good cream to powder foundation. Set that with a loose powder. Then go out with your compact for touch-ups, those oil absorbing sheets, and a nice lip gloss. Good to go.

Afrobella – What’s your favorite brand of makeup and why? Do you use any local stuff, like Sacha?

Sandra – I just love MAC. I love their bronzers and shadows. And I also love L’Oreal HIP, their eyeshadows are vibrant and intense. And I do use Sacha, I like their blushes and they have a great fix it spray.

Afrobella – Is there any one look you’re really loving for this Carnival season, or does your inspiration come strictly from the costume the person is wearing? What’s the hottest makeup trend in Trinidad these days?

Sandra – Each costume inspires a different look in terms of color and theme. But I know, me personally — for Carnival Monday and Tuesday, I love glitter on the eyes. MAC and NYX have some fantastic glitter liners that are really easy to use.

At this point, we go off on a tangent because Sandra hasn’t ever heard of Urban Decay! Urban Decay’s glitter liners are practically made for Carnival. And so is their eyeshadow primer potion. So I gush about them for a while. Then back to the interview.

Afrobella – Do you do airbrush makeup? I realize that’s become increasingly popular in Trinidad, among women who want to cover scars and stretch marks. What are your thoughts on that?

Sandra –I do airbrush makeup… I think it’s excellent for covering up scars. But on older skin it can be very… turkey-like. With the airbrushing you have to pull the skin taut. I don’t know if you can visualize what I’m talking about. Half the time you’d be better off with a good cream to powder foundation and a sponge.

Afrobella – For the ladies who can’t afford to get their makeup done professionally, what’s the best advice you’ve got to give?

Sandra – You definitely don’t need to hire a professional to go out and look beautiful on Carnival day. I would say look through a magazine to find a look you like, go for something dramatic in terms of eye makeup. And then practice your look beforehand so you can figure out your technique. Don’t wait until Carnival Monday morning to try something new. Find a look you like and figure it out first.

For even more Carnival makeup tips, of course Trinidad Carnival Diary should be your first port of call. Enjoy the celebration and stay safe, bellas!

Afrobella of the Month — Najwa Moses, Styleaholic and Icon-in-the-making

Najwa Moses is striking. Najwa Moses is bold. Najwa Moses lives her life full speed ahead. She’s working hard towards making herself a brand, and from the interview we had a week or so ago, I’m convinced she knows what she’s doing.

She’s a podcaster, a videopodcaster, a writer, a fashionista, a marketing maven, a self promoter, a fashion do, and an unabashed fashion don’t all at the same time. And in this era of changing media, she’s one of my new heroines. I caught up with her in a fun phone interview recently, and we chatted about anything and everything.

One of Najwa’s first roles in fashion was doing business development for a not-for-profit organization through the Brooklyn Chamber of Commerce. “My job was to help promote the work of local designers, helping them get to trade shows, helping them do numbers, PR, whatever whatever. One of the first things I created was called a shopping party. All these shopping parties — Shecky’s, Gen Art, all of them were quote-unquote “inspired” by the concept I came up with,” she declared proudly.

“Wow,” I interjected.

“I know, right! I don’t get credit for that? When you’re 20 years old or 21 years old and you don’t have a big company with lots of money behind you… when you put something out that’s a novelty idea, you’re really leaving it out there for other people to pick up. And that’s unfortunate. But I’ve learned, and you know what, they can’t take creativity away.”

That pick yourself up, dust yourself off attitude has taken her from strength to strength. Najwa’s shopping party was called The Closet, and it involved a lot of indie designers who weren’t aware of their potential. She started the event in 2001, and she learned as she went along. “I understand how things work a little bit better now.”

The last time they held the event was in 2005. At the time, she was also writing for NPR, covering New York Fashion Week, and immersing herself in the culture of style. Still, she found herself yearning to do her own thing. “That’s when I learned about podcasting. It was like — you want your own radio show? Come learn about podcasting. I was like, hell yeah! Jumped into it, did a bunch of great audio interviews, got a brand new website and I was like, oh no, this website must have video. I lost my mind, forgetting how expensive video is,” she laughs. Her website is Styleaholics, and it’s as fabulous as you would expect.

Najwa’s got a lot of personality, and she talks at the speed of traffic in New York City. For example, she had me cracking up when I listened to this Showbuzz podcast, where she recounts visiting Kutztown, Pennsylvania. Pioneering forms of new media doesn’t come cheap, but Najwa’s trying to be savvy about it. Now she has her own YouTube channel, where she features her videopodcast “The In List.” She’s interviewed fashion icons and fabulous celebrities including Diane Von Furstenberg, Kelis, and Marc Ecko (I don’t know what it is, but I find him completely fascinating). She’s starting to make some commercial inroads, too — check her out pimping the Toyota Camry at one of her fashion events. It’s all part of her brand-building master plan.

“I cross many worlds. I don’t just stick with the black fashionista world, or the fashionista world. I am also into the music scene, the food scene, very international high end stuff, or very underground scenes. I think I represent many different types of people and subcultures.” No kidding. In addition to the podcasts, videos, and writing for sites like AOL’s Styleist and Bluefly, Najwa is also the ambassador for Ugly Talent NY, a character model agency started in 1969 that exclusively traffics in “interesting” faces. Multicultural? Old? Tatted up? Obese? Or generally unusual? Ugly NY is looking for you. “The models range from a 300lb Sumo wrestler to a Styleaholic like myself-and I’ve personally have never been happier to be UGLY,” says Najwa.

Which brings me to another defining trait of Najwa’s. Her style. I had to ask her what’s up with that defining look. “My style is just really eclectic. I’m always a little left of fashion, and at the same time, I have to pay attention to that and understand that not everyone will look at me and say oh my God, that’s brilliant. For me, it’s about creating a statement and making sure everyone is noticing me. Because you want to make sure when you walk into an event, all eyes are on you. And in New York City, there’s a lot of people for eyes to be on.”

Believe it or not, being a plus size chick who dresses flamboyantly is working for her. “I’m not a size two. People well say oh my God, is that a detraction? But you know what, it actually helps me. Because it’s like, who is that curvy girl with those big ass boobs and that big ass hair coming in here? You can’t help but notice me. And I’m confident. And I believe in the designers I’m wearing, so it is what it is. Even this year, I’m like, how can I go crazier?”

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Tune In!

I’m so excited! Yours truly will be featured as part of the Blogger’s Roundtable on NPR’s News and Notes today.

Tune in and tell me what you think!

Afrobella, Interviewed

Today yours truly was on NPR’s News and Notes for like, five minutes. Click here to listen — I come in towards the end of the exchange. I was super nervous and very excited, can you tell?? I wish circumstances allowed me to be on for the entire roundtable, I had a LOT to contribute to the earlier discussion of Nas’ alleged album title, which his record label denies. Perhaps there will be another time. Fingers crossed. Much thanks and respect to Afrobella of the Month Farai Chideya for the opportunity!
I was also featured in an interview on Geoffrey Philp’s Blog Spot. Geoffrey is a well respected Jamaican writer who has won numerous writing awards and nominations for his work. He lives in Miami, and his blog really captures the pulse of the local literary scene.

I was extremely honored to be featured in both of these interviews, and I’m proud to share them with you!